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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29880798">Tell Me Which Way To Go</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BinaWrites/pseuds/BinaWrites'>BinaWrites</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Learning to Love You [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>GOT7, JJ Project</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Sex, Angst, Exes, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Makeup Sex, Office Sex, Past Relationship(s), Reconciliation, Second Chances</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 13:54:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,077</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29880798</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BinaWrites/pseuds/BinaWrites</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jinyoung hadn’t known what to expect when he heard a knock on his front door at 8pm on a Sunday night, but his ex-boyfriend certainly wasn’t it. </p><p>or: Jaebeom shows up almost a year to the day he left and Jinyoung has to decide if he'll give him another chance.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Learning to Love You [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2159970</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>94</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Tell Me Which Way To Go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hello hello!</p><p>i'm late in posting this, but it's been a busy time and i tend to be a bit lazy with finalizing fics that are basically finished.</p><p>anyway, here we are! this is an extra for a <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28847130/chapters/70760454">jinson fic</a> i wrote, but there is no jinson in this or even any mention of jackson since it's essentially set in an au where jinyoung and jackson had never met. so it's basically a stand-alone. you definitely don't need to read the original because i've essentially changed everything in the jjp backstory. in fact, it's better if you don't read the original because it might just confuse you (so to anyone who did, please forget everything, and i'm sorry for being difficult).</p><p>unbeta'd, because apparently i live here now.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jinyoung hadn’t known what to expect when he heard a knock on his front door at 8pm on a Sunday night, but his ex-boyfriend certainly wasn’t it. All it took was one look into Jaebeom’s eyes, one look at that beautiful face, and just like that—all the memories came flooding back…</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>One November day, the school was abuzz with talk of a new transfer student that had just arrived. Apparently, he was insanely attractive and had everyone swooning. Jinyoung had never been one to participate in gossip, and he didn’t have friends to gossip with anyway, so he ignored the rumours about the new student.</p><p>He’d certainly never expected to fall in love with him.</p><p>When Jaebeom walked into senior math class that day, which Jinyoung was taking to get ahead, the only open spot was in the front row right beside Jinyoung—since no one ever wanted to sit with the sophomore who was smart enough to be in a senior class. Jaebeom was dangerously handsome with his black leather jacket and slicked back hair and Jinyoung fell for him immediately. He’d never thought Jaebeom would reciprocate his feelings, or even ever talk to him, but after their first test, Jaebeom noticed that Jinyoung was good at math and asked him to be his tutor.</p><p>Jinyoung never understood how or why Jaebeom fell in love with him. He was a mousy kid, very skinny and nerdy looking, with thick glasses and big ears. Jaebeom was, well, the opposite, and Jinyoung was infatuated with everything about him. He was solidly built and had sharp features, hair flowing past his ears, and an insanely sexy anti-eyebrow piercing. Confidence and charisma radiated off of him in waves, and with the way he flipped his hair out of his eyes, it was obvious he’d done modeling. And yet, Jaebeom was intrigued by Jinyoung. Perhaps it was his shyness, his intelligence, or his wit—or maybe a combination of it all—but Jaebeom couldn’t stay away. As they got to know each other through their tutoring, the two boys fell in love.</p><p>After Jaebeom graduated, he stayed in the city for university to be closer to Jinyoung while he finished high school. Things weren’t much different except that they no longer had classes together. Jinyoung kept thinking that Jaebeom would leave him for some hot college student, waiting for the day when Jaebeom would tell him it was over—but it didn’t come.</p><p>When Jinyoung graduated high school two years later, his academic career hit the ground running. He did his undergraduate degree, his master’s degree, and then his PhD. Meanwhile, Jaebeom had finished college before Jinyoung was done his undergrad and started working for a music producer in the city. It was a busy time for Jinyoung, but Jaebeom found little ways of staying present and supporting him like walking him home after classes or bringing dinner to his office when he was working late.</p><p>When Jinyoung started his master’s program, the two decided to move in together. At first, things were great. Jinyoung loved having the independence of living on his own with his boyfriend, having only ever lived with his parents. The issues started about a year into them living together. Jinyoung was doing so well in his program that he was able to finish his master’s early and start his PhD. He was even on track to finish his PhD in only two years, which was unheard of but doable given that Jinyoung was so gifted. The downside was that he needed to spend more time in the lab, TAing classes, or at the library. Jinyoung felt awful that he was barely home, but he knew Jaebeom would understand.</p><p>Jaebeom, however, was slowly watching his boyfriend become more and more successful while he stayed at the same level at his company. He saw Jinyoung receive award after award, scholarship after scholarship, while he was never recognized or appreciated by his managers. He began to feel intimidated by Jinyoung and felt that Jinyoung was too good for him.</p><p>During the last year of Jinyoung’s PhD, Jaebeom started to think about proposing to Jinyoung. They’d talked about it a lot, but Jinyoung had always said he wanted to finish school first. He didn’t want any distractions. So Jaebeom waited patiently for Jinyoung to graduate, and, as the date got closer, Jaebeom started to second-guess things. For some reason he’d always thought that once Jinyoung graduated, things would be better. But as Jinyoung spoke about his plans after graduation to start working as a professor and the new research endeavours he intended to launch, Jaebeom realized that things would never be like how they were in high school. Jinyoung would continue with his academic activities, likely quickly accelerating through his promotions and tenure, while Jaebeom would stay where he was. For the rest of his life, he would live in Jinyoung’s shadow.</p><p>A week after Jinyoung graduated, Jaebeom told him that he had fallen out of love with him.</p><p>When Jinyoung asked for an explanation, Jaebeom only said that it was too hard to love someone who made him feel like a failure. This shattered Jinyoung’s heart. He explained that he’d never seen Jaebeom like that and begged him to stay, but Jaebeom had already made his decision. He’d already packed his things and he left that day.</p><p>Jinyoung’s last words to him echoed in the empty house for weeks after Jaebeom left.</p><p>
  <em>Please, hyung, don’t go. Stay, please stay.</em>
</p><p>He thought he would never recover from that heartbreak. For a month, Jinyoung was an absolute mess. Then, he tried to get his life together. The good thing was that Jinyoung now had a PhD in psychology and had secured a position as a psychology professor at his alma mater, so he felt he had all the resources to help himself come out of this on the other side. He began researching about the psychology of heartbreak and learning about coping mechanisms and steps to overcome it. It helped at first, and as Jinyoung built up the walls around his heart, he started to think that he was over Jaebeom, that he was moving on. Sure, the thought of Jaebeom still gave him butterflies and the memory of him leaving still left him feeling sick, but more than anything, Jinyoung was just mad.</p><p>Anger was natural, so Jinyoung didn’t think anything of it. He held the anger close, right next to the empty hole in his chest that had once kept his love for the man. He carried it with him for months, until Jaebeom showed up on his doorstep almost one year to the day he left.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>When Jinyoung finally snapped out of his reverie, his first instinct was to slam the door in Jaebeom’s stupid face. Jaebeom must have seen the thought cross his mind, because he extended his hand and caught the door before Jinyoung had the chance to close it.</p><p>“Please, Jinyoungie, I just want to talk.”</p><p>
  <em>Jinyoungie?</em>
</p><p>He was livid. Jaebeom had no right to come back into his life completely out of the blue, show up to his home, and call him <em>Jinyoungie</em>.</p><p>“Don’t call me that, Jaebeom,” Jinyoung spat.</p><p>Jaebeom held up his hands in defeat. “Sorry. Jinyoung.”</p><p>“How did you even find me?”</p><p>A confused look crossed Jaebeom’s face. “Uh, I used to live here? With you?”</p><p>Jinyoung’s anger at the mention of them living together was clear as day, and Jaebeom noticed. He started to close the door again but Jaebeom stuck out his foot to stop it. “I’m sorry! Jinyoung, please, can I come inside? I really just want to talk.”</p><p>“I don’t want to hear what you have to say,” Jinyoung fumed. “I don’t want to see your stupid face. I want you to crawl back into whatever hellhole you came out of and stay there. Go away.”</p><p>He started to close the door again, but then he heard it—small and shy, and yet enough to unravel Jinyoung completely:</p><p>“I made so many mistakes, Jinyoung.”</p><p>Jinyoung paused.</p><p>“I’m so sorry for hurting you,” Jaebeom continued when he realized Jinyoung wasn’t closing the door just yet. “You deserved better.”</p><p>Jinyoung took a deep breath and closed his eyes. In those first few months after Jaebeom left, Jinyoung had imagined him crawling back to say sorry or to beg for another chance. In his daydreams, he would slap his ex, spit on him, throw him out, kick him down the stairs. But Jinyoung was braver in his mind than in the real world, and having the scene unfold outside his brain was an entirely different thing. A part of him—a big part—wanted to continue slamming the door in his stupid face. But at the same time…Jinyoung’s heart softened at Jaebeom’s pained, pleading expression.</p><p>They had been together for nine years. He deserved to say what he came to say.</p><p>Jinyoung opened the door and turned around, walking into the kitchen and pulling out one of the chairs from the table. He pointed to it. “You will sit there,” he instructed. “You will not touch anything. You will talk and then you will leave. Deal?”</p><p>The man nodded, his expression innocent and now a bit hopeful. He closed the front door behind him and sat in the chair Jinyoung had indicated, playing with the strings of his black hoodie nervously. Jinyoung stayed at the other end of the kitchen and leaned against the counter.</p><p>Jaebeom looked down and Jinyoung could almost see the thoughts running through his mind. “I miss you,” he said with a small voice. “I’ve missed you every day since I left, every day for the past year. I thought I would be able to get over you, I thought I would be able to forget, but I couldn’t, and I didn’t.” He looked up, his eyes wide and sad and pleading. “Jinyoung, I’m still in love with you.”</p><p>The countertop at Jinyoung’s back felt sturdy as he sank against it. “Jaebeom, you left me because you fell out of love with me,” he said, not kindly. “By definition, that means you were already over me. So whatever love you think you’re feeling now, I’m sure you’ll fall right back out of it soon enough.”</p><p>A pained expressed filled Jaebeom’s face and Jinyoung felt his anger waver just a tad. “I was an idiot back then. I think I was just so upset watching you become so successful while I was such a nobody that it made me resent you or something. I started seeing you as a reminder of my failures and it hurt. I guess at the time it felt like the love was gone, but after I left I realized that it had been there all along. I missed you so much it hurt. I wanted to come to you and beg you to take me back, but I knew I didn’t deserve it. So I decided I would become a man who was worthy of you.” He paused, a somewhat proud look on his face.</p><p>“Is that it?”</p><p>“No! That’s not it.” Jaebeom’s voice was frantic. He looked so out of sorts and it was throwing Jinyoung off. This was not the Jaebeom he was used to. “I’m sorry. I had a whole speech prepared, but once I saw you I just got so nervous,” he said, his eyes roving over Jinyoung’s simple white t-shirt and grey sweats. “I mean, hell, you look so <em>good</em>, Jinyoung.”</p><p>Jinyoung scoffed, even as his heart started to beat a little faster.</p><p>“Listen,” Jaebeom continued, his voice steadier now, “I’ve been working on myself. My therapist says I’ve come really far and we figured out a lot of the issues I had back when we were together. And I started my own music label. It’s doing really well and I’m making good money, Jinyoungie—sorry, Jinyoung. I know I’m not perfect, but I’m not the person I was before. I think I can finally be the partner you always wanted me to be.”</p><p>Jinyoung’s ears perked up at the word <em>therapist</em>. He couldn’t believe Jaebeom had actually started to see a professional, Jinyoung had told him to for years but he’d never listened. The thought made Jinyoung curious, but also…proud? Impressed? Hopeful?</p><p>He closed his eyes. He still couldn’t believe this was happening. But now that it was, Jinyoung had things he wanted to say too. Things he’d never had the chance to voice. “I was so in love with you I would’ve moved heaven and earth if you’d asked it of me. You never needed to be something else, hyung, you just needed to stay.” He choked a little on the last part.</p><p>The chair squeaked against the floor as Jaebeom stood up, his eyes wild with an emotion Jinyoung couldn’t place. “God, I didn’t see that. I didn’t know you loved me that much. I was so scared that you would wake up one day and realize you deserved so much better than me.”</p><p>“But I had no idea you felt that way until you broke up with me,” Jinyoung insisted, ashamed of how his voice became a little more whiny, a little more like the teenager he’d been when they met. “Maybe we could have fixed things if you’d only talked to me.”</p><p>“Maybe we can fix it now,” Jaebeom said hesitantly. He started to walk over to Jinyoung. “I know there’s no excuse for what I did and I hate myself for hurting you. If you tell me you want me out of your life for good, I will respect that. I will leave and I’ll never bother you again.”</p><p>“But, Jinyoung,” Jaebeom continued. By this point, he’d reached Jinyoung, placing his hands cautiously on his arms, testing to see how Jinyoung would react to the contact. Jaebeom’s hands felt warm and strong, the familiar touch bringing Jinyoung back to a life he thought he’d lost. “If you tell me there’s even a chance for us, that maybe you think you can find it in your heart to forgive me, that somewhere deep down you do still love me, then I’ll wait for you for as long as it takes.”</p><p>The words tugged at Jinyoung’s heart, begging him to give in. But he’d tried so hard to get over this, he couldn’t let it all go to waste just because Jaebeom was saying the words he’d secretly longed to hear every day for the past year.</p><p>He shrugged Jaebeom off and walked to the other side of the table, trying to keep the man at a distance. “And what happens if I say yes? What then?” Jinyoung asked quietly, his voice trembling. “It’s not like we can just pick up where we left off like nothing happened.”</p><p>“Why not?” Jaebeom asked abruptly, startling Jinyoung a bit.</p><p>“Because we can’t,” Jinyoung said, feeling a sudden burst of sadness. <em>Because it wouldn’t work out. Because you would only leave me for a second time. Because I can’t go through that again.</em></p><p>“But why?” Jaebeom demanded, insistent but not angry.</p><p>The tears began to well up in Jinyoung’s eyes. He looked down, not wanting Jaebeom to see how emotional he was. “Because we just <em>can’t</em>, hyung,” he repeated quietly.</p><p>“Jinyoung-ah, please,” Jaebeom said, closing the distance between them with caution, “if you want to be with me then that’s all that matters. Whether it’s been a day or a year doesn’t change anything, as long as we love each other it’ll be okay.” Jaebeom reached out to stroke his cheek softly and Jinyoung couldn’t help but close his eyes. The touch was so incredibly familiar and it made Jinyoung’s heart ache. He let himself lean into it just a bit. “Do you…still love me?”</p><p>The word “no” started to form around Jinyoung’s lips but a pang in his chest made him stop suddenly. He knew saying it would be a lie.</p><p>Even without an answer, Jaebeom saw the truth in Jinyoung’s eyes and he took a chance. He leaned closer, ever so slightly, another test to see if Jinyoung would respond in kind. His breath was hot and Jinyoung found himself drawn to it, inching toward Jaebeom to breathe him in, to taste his scent that smelled like—</p><p>Before he knew it, their lips met and his mind went blank. All of a sudden, he was fifteen years old again, kissing Jaebeom for the first time by his locker after school. The thought made him nostalgic and it triggered a flood of emotions. His heart swelled with love and pain and desire and loss.</p><p>It took Jinyoung longer than he cared to admit for him to return to reality. This was his <em>ex-boyfriend</em> he was kissing. The man who’d said he loved him one day and left him the next. The one who’d torn his heart into a million pieces and left him a hollow shell of the person he’d been.</p><p>The realizations brought all the anger back and had Jinyoung suddenly pushing the larger man away his all his might. He separated himself and backed away to the other end of the room. Jaebeom looked hurt and confused but didn’t come closer. “I’m sorry,” he said, “I’m sorry if that was too much.”</p><p>Jinyoung shook his head fervently. He needed to think. About what just happened, about what he wanted. And he couldn’t do any of it with Jaebeom here. “I can’t do this right now, hyung. I need you to leave.”</p><p>“Okay, I understand,” Jaebeom said, his voice hurt but gentle. “But before I go, I just need to know one thing.”</p><p>Jinyoung said nothing, but he looked back up into Jaebeom’s dark eyes. They held such pain and such longing, it made Jinyoung’s anger wane again.</p><p>“Do you want me to leave for good?”</p><p>“I—” Jinyoung knew he should say yes. But in the end, he settled for, “I don’t know yet.”</p><p>Because the walls around his heart had already started to break, and the cracks were getting deeper.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Although Jinyoung tried to focus on his lectures and office hours on Monday, he found Jaebeom occupying his thoughts all day. When he finally checked his phone that evening, he saw three texts from an unknown number—well, it was unknown to his phone, but Jinyoung was all too familiar with it—and his heart flipped as he read the messages.</p><p>[10:43 AM] <em>Hey, Jinyoung. Can I call you?</em></p><p>[1:21 PM] <em>Talk to me, Jinyoungie.</em></p><p>[6:57 PM] <em>Can I come over?</em></p><p>Part of him wondered if Jaebeom was going to show up to his house even without a response, but it was already nine o’clock so Jinyoung figured it was unlikely. Still, it didn’t stop him from peeking out of his front window to see if Jaebeom’s car was out front. He felt a little disappointed when there was nothing there.</p><p>On Tuesday, Jinyoung tried to go about his day as usual. He hadn’t responded to Jaebeom’s texts from the day before and his now silent phone was burning a hole through his pocket. That night, he stared at his phone, the only light source in his otherwise dark room. His finger hovered over Jaebeom’s number, the call button looking oh so tempting. He lay there for what felt like forever, telling himself to just make the damn phone call, but, in the end, he couldn’t bring himself to do it.</p><p>Perhaps Jaebeom’s ears were burning, because all of a sudden Jinyoung’s phone was ringing madly and Jaebeom’s number lit up the screen. He froze. This was what he wanted, wasn’t it? He’d been in a state of almost making a phone call for the past hour—fuck, <em>three</em> hours—and now the man was actually calling and he couldn’t even pick it up.</p><p>The phone rang once. Twice. Three times.</p><p>Jinyoung knew it wouldn’t ring a fourth. Suddenly the device was at his ear and he could hear the sound of Jaebeom’s voice on the other end.</p><p>“Hello? Jinyoung?”</p><p>He didn’t know what to say. “<em>Hello</em>” would, of course, be a perfectly fine choice, but Jinyoung’s lips wouldn’t move.</p><p>“Jinyoungie, I know you’re there. Please, say something,” Jaebeom’s voice pleaded.</p><p>But Jinyoung was still angry, he was still hurt, so he couldn’t bring himself to speak. He waited and said nothing, even as his hand refused to hang up or take the phone away from his ear.</p><p>There was a sigh on the other end and Jinyoung thought Jaebeom was about to hang up. But then the man started to talk.</p><p>He talked about nothing and about everything all at once. He told Jinyoung about his day, about what he did at work and what he ate. He spoke about the project he’d been working on and how Nora was being particularly affectionate when he got home. He told Jinyoung about the moments throughout the day that he was reminded of him. Not in a pleading way, just...sharing. The way they used to tell each other about their days when they were cuddled in bed before they fell asleep.</p><p>Tears flowed down Jinyoung’s cheeks before he even realized they were there. Jaebeom’s words brought with them a nostalgia that filled every inch of him. His chest felt heavy and tight as he listened to the voice he was used to hearing only in his dreams. He tried to control his sobs but he knew in the way that Jaebeom stuttered at one point that the man had heard it. He said nothing, but his voice turned even softer, filled with even more love. It only made Jinyoung cry harder.</p><p>There was a long pause when Jaebeom finished his recount of his day and realized he had nothing more to say. Jinyoung could sense him waiting, hoping.</p><p>After a minute, Jaebeom let out a sad sigh. “I guess I’ll go.”</p><p>Jinyoung didn’t know if he meant tonight or forever.</p><p>“Goodnight, Jinyoung-ah.”</p><p>
  <em>Please, hyung, don’t go. Stay, please stay.</em>
</p><p>After a moment, the line cut off, and the walls around Jinyoung’s heart shattered.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Jinyoung awoke the next morning feeling entirely different. Despite the fact that he’d spent most of the night crying, leaving his head aching and his eyes puffy, he felt decidedly better.</p><p>As soon as Jaebeom had hung up, Jinyoung had realized the anger he’d felt all these months was just a band-aid on his bleeding heart. A way to deny what he was really feeling inside. He’d thought it was proof that he’d gotten over everything, but that phone call made Jinyoung realize that his heart still belonged to Jaebeom.</p><p>It wasn’t even that he wanted Jaebeom back, it was so much more than a simple want. Every fibre of Jinyoung’s being was bursting with the overwhelming <em>need</em> to be with the love of his life again. He’d been teetering on this line of wanting the man back but not being ready to face it, and now he no longer cared. It didn’t matter that it had been a year. It didn’t matter that Jaebeom had hurt him in the past. It didn’t matter that Jinyoung was too proud and stubborn to admit it before. What mattered was that he was still in love with Jaebeom.</p><p>That day was packed with back-to-back classes and Jinyoung found his mind wandering even as he lectured. He was desperate to get home and see Jaebeom, or call Jaebeom—something, anything to let him know how he felt. But the more he wished for the day to end, the more it seemed to drag on.</p><p>After his night class, the last class of the day, Jinyoung was packing up his things from his desk, relieved to finally able to go home, when he saw a shadow in the reflection of the window. He didn’t have to turn around to know who it was. He also didn’t have turn around to know that something had changed. He couldn’t place it exactly, but whatever it was made Jinyoung struggle to find his voice.</p><p>“How did you find me?” he asked, still facing his desk, his voice shaking around the words.</p><p>“The school directory.”</p><p>Every professor’s office building and room number was posted online so students could find them easily. He felt a pang in his chest at the thought that Jaebeom had searched for him one more time.</p><p>“I’d ask you to turn around,” Jaebeom said, his voice low and sultry, “but I must admit I’m enjoying the view from here.”</p><p>Jinyoung whirled around instantly. He was greeted by a smug-looking Jaebeom leaning against the door frame with the most tantalizing grin on his face. He wore a black leather jacket and his hair was combed away from his face. He’d even put in his anti-eyebrow piercing. Jinyoung sucked in a breath. He looked like—well…Jinyoung was all too familiar with this look. It didn’t take long for him to realize that Jaebeom was trying something, one last attempt to win Jinyoung back. An act, really, an homage to the teenagers they’d been when they fell in love.</p><p>“Hi, Jinyoungie.”</p><p>“Hi,” Jinyoung breathed, though he wasn’t sure how coherent the word actually came out. Just because this was an act, that didn’t mean it wasn’t a <em>good</em> act.</p><p>“Did you miss me?”</p><p>His head nodded instinctively.</p><p>The way Jaebeom’s face lit up gave Jinyoung a warm feeling in his chest. “You did?” he asked, almost in disbelief.</p><p>Jinyoung nodded again, more intentionally this time.</p><p>Then Jaebeom’s gaze darkened and he took a few steps forward until he was just inches away. The air in the room was suddenly hot and sticky and Jinyoung struggled to take in a breath. He was sure the man could hear how loud his heart was beating.</p><p>Jaebeom brought his mouth to Jinyoung’s ear, the warmth of their closeness sending shivers down his neck. “Say it, Jinyoung-ah,” Jaebeom whispered, then kissed Jinyoung’s right cheek.</p><p>“I missed you, hyung.”</p><p>Jaebeom hummed with approval and kissed Jinyoung’s left cheek. “Tell me you want me.”</p><p>“I want you.”</p><p>“Jinyoung-ah,” Jaebeom cooed softly, right against Jinyoung’s lips. “Do you still love me?”</p><p>“Yes,” Jinyoung breathed.</p><p>And then their mouths crashed together, Jaebeom pushing himself against Jinyoung with so much force Jinyoung thought he would break. He opened Jinyoung’s mouth with his and Jinyoung was flooded with his taste and his scent. His hands moved up Jinyoung’s thighs, squeezing and groping as they made their way to his ass. He bit Jinyoung’s ear, not lightly, sending a jolt of pain and pleasure throughout Jinyoung’s body. The sensation made him gasp and moan all at once and he swore silently at himself for being so easily aroused. Jaebeom growled, the sound of Jinyoung’s pleasure making him insatiable. He swept the remaining papers off the desk and laid Jinyoung down on it before climbing on top of him. Jinyoung wrapped his legs around him and Jaebeom ground his hips downward, letting Jinyoung feel the growing bulge of arousal in his pants. He groaned softly at the memory of what that wicked thing in Jaebeom’s pants had done to him in the past, what it could do to him now.</p><p>He reached down and palmed Jaebeom’s stiffening cock, stroking and squeezing softly over his pants. At the touch, Jaebeom seemed to let loose every desire he’d been holding onto for the past year. He tugged off his shirt and then Jinyoung’s, kissing and licking all along the skin of Jinyoung’s neck and shoulders like he couldn’t touch him fast enough. He sucked mark after mark along Jinyoung’s clavicle, leaving behind a crude necklace of red and purple spots. Jinyoung pulled Jaebeom’s hips closer with his legs, desperate to feel some friction against his cock, which was now achingly hard. Jaebeom didn’t deny him, grinding their hips together in a way that made Jinyoung wracked with want. He ran his hands through Jaebeom’s hair, the long tresses soft and familiar between his fingers. Jaebeom purred against his chest, moving downward to suck on one of the peaked nipples he found there. He closed his teeth around it gently and Jinyoung gasped. Jaebeom smirked and gave the other nipple the same treatment, and Jinyoung yanked at Jaebeom’s hair reflexively.</p><p>Dark eyes glanced up to meet his and, for a moment, the two stared at each other. They had been apart for so long, Jinyoung almost thought this was a dream. It would be a good dream, sure, but that wasn’t what he wanted anymore. Desperate to make sure this was real, he pulled Jaebeom’s head back up to meet his again, pressing their lips together furiously. Their kisses were heated and hurried, but Jinyoung noticed they fell back into a familiar pattern. They fit together so well, he and Jaebeom, they always had.</p><p>They tore off the rest of their clothes until they were nothing but two sweaty, naked bodies, pressed together against the cool wood of Jinyoung’s desk. Jinyoung wrapped his legs around Jaebeom again, giving a tight squeeze this time, and Jaebeom understood the cue to lift him up without hesitation. The headrush from being pulled up so quickly made Jinyoung feel light and airy. Then Jaebeom pushed him up against the window, the extra support freeing his hands to roam Jinyoung’s body. The chill of the glass was such a contrast against Jinyoung’s heated skin and he gasped, breaking their kiss. Jaebeom took the opportunity to grab Jinyoung’s jaw and turn his head, latching his lips onto Jinyoung’s neck now stretched long for him to play with. Jinyoung groaned at the flick of Jaebeom’s tongue, his strong lips sucking hard against the tender skin.</p><p>“<em>Hyung</em>,” he moaned.</p><p>Jaebeom hummed in response. He knew what Jinyoung wanted before he even said it. In one swift motion, Jaebeom pulled him away from the window and flipped him around so that he was bent over with his torso leaning on the desk.</p><p>The man really did know him so well.</p><p>Rough hands groped and squeezed his ass, fingers playing and teasing along his taint and his hole. His body vibrated at Jaebeom’s touch as those hands brought all the heat back into his body and then some. It only took a moment before Jinyoung heard the click of a bottle cap and then felt the cool sensation of lube being pouring onto his skin. He wanted to comment on the fact that Jaebeom had brought <em>lube</em> with him, but frankly, he was far too thankful for it to mock him right now.</p><p>Jaebeom rubbed the liquid all over Jinyoung’s ass, warming it up with his hands. Then he pressed his fingers along the tight muscles of Jinyoung’s hole again before pushing one of his fingers inside. Jinyoung let out a soft noise. It felt so good, it felt so <em>right</em>. He begged Jaebeom for more and Jaebeom quickly worked him open with a second and then a third finger. He pumped with his right hand as his left caressed and squeezed Jinyoung’s body, encouraging his muscles to relax around him. Jinyoung didn’t even care that his naked torso was completely pressed against his hard desk, nor did he care that his office door was still open and the evening cleaning staff would be coming by soon. He didn’t care about any of it, not when Jaebeom was knuckle deep inside him and Jinyoung was crying out for <em>more more more</em>.</p><p>At the same moment that Jinyoung knew he was finally prepped enough, Jaebeom pulled out his fingers and replaced them with his lubed-up cock. <em>Still so in sync</em>, Jinyoung remarked to himself<em>.</em> He felt his hole stretch around the thick head as Jaebeom slowly, carefully, pushed it inside. Jinyoung felt a moan echo low in his throat. It had been so long since he had been filled like this. It had been so long since <em>Jaebeom</em> had filled him like this. He pushed deeper and Jinyoung cried out, the stretch threatening to overwhelm him. But then Jaebeom kissed his back and shushed him softly, murmuring praises of how good Jinyoung felt, how beautiful he was, how long he’d waited for this. He stroked along Jinyoung’s back and hips with his rough but tender hands and Jinyoung relaxed at the words and the touch.</p><p>Jaebeom must have felt him unclench and took that as the silent permission it was to start moving. He started slow, gauging Jinyoung’s discomfort but staying firm with his movements. Noises threatened to escape Jinyoung’s lips at every burst of pleasure Jaebeom gave him, and he let all of them out. He wanted Jaebeom to know how good it felt, how much he loved it. The pace increased and Jaebeom’s breathing behind him was audible as he plunged into Jinyoung unforgivingly. Every thrust jerked Jinyoung further into the desk until the sharp edge dug into his hip bones, but he didn’t care. He propped himself up on his forearms and arched his back, giving Jaebeom the perfect angle to hit his prostate. He screamed, then, as the sensation sent waves of pleasure to every inch of his body. Jaebeom was unrelenting, continuing to pound into Jinyoung harder and faster until he could no longer take it.</p><p>“Hyung,” he managed to say between moans, hoping Jaebeom knew what he meant.</p><p>And Jaebeom did. He reached between Jinyoung’s hips and the desk to grab his cock, now unbearably hard and leaking beads of precome onto the floor. Jaebeom’s still lubed hand stroked along it in time with his thrusts, fucking Jinyoung with his cock and hand in tandem. Jinyoung wanted to savour this moment, the feeling of being so completely full and so completely pleasured, but his body betrayed him. He came with a shudder that shook his entire being and he cried out so loudly he was sure the entire campus could hear. He felt his come spill over Jaebeom’s hand and the man made a low noise of approval. He smeared it over Jinyoung’s cock and stroked a few more times, until Jinyoung trembled from the overstimulation. Then Jaebeom pulled his hand back instantly and returned his focus to Jinyoung’s ass. He continued to drive his cock into him, bottoming out completely with each thrust and making loud smacking noises as their bodies collided. Jaebeom squeezed and groped harder now and Jinyoung could tell he was getting close. It was all in the way his hands moved—urgent, desperate to find purchase on something to ground him as he teetered on the edge of his orgasm.</p><p>“Come for me, hyung,” Jinyoung pleaded breathlessly, and then Jaebeom lost it. He let out a groan and drove into Jinyoung <em>hard</em>, staying here as he filled him with both his cock and his come. Jinyoung sighed with a smile. That was always his favourite part, feeling Jaebeom’s release inside him.</p><p>As they came down from the high of the euphoria, Jaebeom leaned forward to kiss between Jinyoung’s shoulders a few times and then gently pulled out. Jinyoung turned around and hopped up on the desk, ignoring the pain in his ass, then tugged Jaebeom toward him by his hips. He kissed him once, twice, three times.</p><p>Jaebeom smiled against his lips. “I’m so happy that worked,” he said, almost giddily.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>Jaebeom pulled back slightly and nodded to their abandoned clothes. “The outfit—you know, the high school thing. I thought it might make you nostalgic, and I was right.”</p><p>Jinyoung laughed. “You’re so lucky you’re pretty.”</p><p>The look on Jaebeom’s face was one of genuine confusion. It made Jinyoung’s heart swell. “What?”</p><p>“I wanted <em>you</em>, Jaebeommie,” he said simply, “not the clothes, not the act.”</p><p>“Huh.” Jaebeom made a thoughtful expression. “So, I shouldn’t have worn the outfit?”</p><p>“Oh no, the outfit was good,” Jinyoung assured him. “The outfit will now be a staple in our future bedroom activities.” He ran his hands up and down Jaebeom’s biceps, loving the way his muscles felt beneath his fingers.</p><p>Jaebeom raised his brows and grinned. “Our future?”</p><p>Jinyoung just kissed him, long and slow. “Yes, hyung,” he said, “our future.”</p><p>They kissed again and Jinyoung cherished just how right this really did feel. He pressed his forehead against Jaebeom’s and took a moment to breathe him in. Jaebeom smelled like everything he’d ever wanted. Like love and nostalgia and—home.</p><p>He smelled like home.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>so this fic was supposed to be a 2k smutty extra and then in true bina fashion i added 4k of other stuff. it was also supposed to be nothing but a hot office sex scene but then i added all this <em>emotion</em> leading up to it, and it completely changed the tone of the piece. not in a bad way, i still like how it turned out, but i will mourn the alt version where there is no love, only angry sex. ah well.</p><p>writing about exes making up is hard, mostly because there is a lot of assigned blame and it's challenging to make both parties likeable enough that a reconciliation feels right. i wanted to show here that sometimes people feel hurt and insecure and they make decisions they regret, but they can also grow and change and sometimes second chances are worth it. though i'd say that this is probably the exception and not the rule--after all, this is fiction!</p><p>this was my first time writing jjp so i'd love to hear what you think! :) </p><p>feel free to come say hi on <a href="https://twitter.com/huahuaspassword">Twitter</a> if that's your thing!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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